So, I sat in F-120 pondering on the conversation I had with my friend just before his 10:30 am class.
Why wasn’t I speaking to my friend group for three weeks? Why was I trying to be alone hiding under the guise of ‘feeling disrespected and needing some space’? Was it really worth it?
I just abandoned the boys and left them clueless, clinging to an incident that could have been talked about. Their offence was that they were present when I had an interaction with the person I felt had offended me. I just transferred my aggression. I mean they hadn’t really done anything to me and even if they did, was it enough to shut them out for weeks without saying anything, when we are practically always together?
Meanwhile, the person, with whom I had that interaction with cared less about it such that the next day she said ‘Hi’ to me in the hallway. But here I was disliking her when she had gone past that. Thankfully, we had a conversation weeks later when she asked me, “Do you have a problem with me?” and after speaking our minds, we mended fences.
This whole situation, after it had been resolved made me realize how we hold hurt back so much so that even after what we perceive to be the cause has moved on, we are still clinging, holding onto it and not allowing it go.
Then my mind goes to many things that we lose because of holding onto hurt.
Relationships…Opportunities…Businesses…Careers…
Peace, time, hope and joy. Then the question of whether it is really worth it comes to mind again.
Sometimes, we just need to let it go! The hurt, pain, bitterness, anger…all of it.
Of course, hurt, like every other feeling is valid but letting it go to move on is valid as well.
Why? Because we need to move on, grow, and release the light within. Forgive me but I’m not one who believes that the light lies only at the end of the tunnel. I believe that there is light inside us and ‘letting it go’ provides enough room for the light to shine radiantly.
Maybe if we opened up more and actually talked about how we felt, our feelings may not become self-destructive. Imagine drowning in pain when everyone else is drunk with joy. Living in solitude when others are laughing together. If only we could understand that some of the things we even hold onto aren’t that significant to cause us the hurt they cause us; then perhaps most of our goals will be achieved by fifty percent.
So my friend, let your light shine by letting it go so that you can have peace!
Charles